One of the guys I use to like, he got on today and I was talking to him. Well we always fought when I liked him and all so I just said fuck it cause he says he liked me too and I will not ever have a relationship that all I do is fight. I dont think that is right. But any way I kept saying I love you to him you know just a friendly I love you not that it meant something, well he's like yeah I have heard that a hundred times and i'm like it is not like it meant anything so what's the difference and hes like fine then. Well if he says that you know you did something wrong. Anyways to get this over with i am like what matters all we do is fight and besides you got a girl. And I am like why do you care any way i'm not that special. Well hes like I just do but could not give a good reason why he cared. But any ways I do kind of still like him he was the first guy I actually told that I liked and I dont usally do things like that. There is a lot of guys I like but none of them no I like them besides him. A lot of people think I am lez or some thing cause I have never had a boyfriend but i'm not that's just sick. But I just guess I am to fat and ugly to have a boyfriend so I just leave it like that. I mean if a guy liked me than they can come up to me and ask me out if not all well. I will live.

  I think finally I am in peace with everyone at one time which is good. Some of my friends hate each other and it is hard to keep peace with them but some how right now I am doing it. Two of my best friends thought they found the love of there lives while back but then they got caught in some lies and both are told to of cheated on them. Now one of them I know cheated but the other one I still dont think did but this dont really matter anymore.

I found this saying today it goes:

me and you are friends

you mad i'm mad

you fight i fight

you hurt i hurt

you jump off a bridge...

i'm gonna miss your stupid ass!!

I think that is great and so true in some ways. but yeah.